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RyanHoliday.net - Meditations on strategy and life
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26 Rules to Be a Better Thinker in 2026

A couple of years ago, I asked Robert Greene what ​he thought about AI. “I think back to when I was 19-years-old and in college,” Robert said. It was a class where they were  to read and translate classical Greek texts “They gave us a passage of Thucydides, the hardest writer of all to read in ancient Greek,” he explained. “I had this one paragraph I must have spent ten hours trying to translate…That had an incredible impact on me. It developed character, patience, and discipline that helps me even to this day. What if I had ChatGPT, and I put the passage in there, and it gave me the translation right away? The whole thinking process would have been annihilated right there.”

What does he mean by “thinking process”? He means the slow, tedious, difficult work of figuring something out for yourself. The discipline. The patience. The hours and hours of sitting with frustration and confusion on your way to knowledge and understanding.

This is why I do all my research on physical notecards. It is not fast, easy, or efficient. And that is the point. Writing things down by hand forces me to engage and struggle with the material for an extended period of time. It forces me to take my time. To go over things again and again. To be immersed. To be focused, patient, and disciplined. To come to understand things deeply. 

People are talking about what AI is going to replace, that it’s the sum total of all human knowledge, that it’s going to make expertise obsolete. And it’s true it will do a lot and it is unbelievably powerful, but in many ways it makes thinking even more important. You have to be able to interpret what it spits out. You need to know when something’s off. Without domain expertise, without the ability to think critically, to question, to push back, you’ll be fooled. Again and again.

The irony of AI, this cutting-edge technology, is that it makes the humanities more valuable than ever. It makes brainpower even more important. Reading. Knowing things. Having taste. Understanding context. Detecting lies or nonsense. In short: being a discerning, critical, clear thinker.

The tools are only getting more powerful. The noise is only getting louder. We’re being bombarded with more information than any generation in history, and I worry—from some of the emails I get, from the comments I see—that too many people just don’t have the ability to wrap their heads around what’s being thrown at them. Which makes clear thinking one of the most essential skills of our time.

What follows is my advice for what you’re going to need more than ever in this brave new world—26 rules for becoming a better thinker. 

– Take another think. The problem with our thoughts is that they’re often wrong—sometimes preposterously so. Nothing illustrates this quite like what’s called an “eggcorn,” words or expressions we confidently mishear and then contort to match our misperception. “All for not” instead of all for naught. “All intensive purposes” instead of all intents and purposes. But the greatest eggcorn is doubly ironic: people who say “you’ve got another thing coming” are, in fact, proving the point of the actual expression, “you’ve got another think coming.” We need to be able to slow down and use a second think. Especially when we’re sure what we think is right. (And by the way, at least 50% of the time I have to ask ChatGPT to think again because it’s answers are obviously wrong). 

– Take walks. For centuries, thinkers have walked many miles a day—because they had to, because they were bored, because they wanted to escape the putrid cities they lived in, because they wanted to get their blood flowing. In the process, they discovered an important side-effect: it cleared their minds and made them better thinkers. Tesla discovered the rotating magnetic field—one of the most important scientific discoveries in modern history—on a walk through a Budapest park in 1882. Hemingway took long walks along the quais in Paris whenever he was stuck and needed to think. Nietzsche—who conceived of Thus Spoke Zarathustra on a long walk—said: “It is only ideas gained from walking that have any worth.” I have never taken a walk without thinking, after, “I am so glad I did that.”

– Embrace contradiction. F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” The world is complicated, ambiguous, paradoxical. To make sense of it, you must be able to balance conflicting truths.. F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” The world is complicated, ambiguous, paradoxical. To make sense of it, you must be able to balance conflicting truths.

– But don’t confuse complexity with nonsense. Stupid people are especially good at having a bunch of contradictory thoughts in their head at once. So the first-rate mind Fitzgerald described isn’t just about tolerating contradiction—it’s really about the ability to examine and interrogate it. It’s asking, Does this actually make sense? 

– Go to first principles. Aristotle taught that one must go to the origins of things, go all the way to the primary truth of the matter, instead of just accepting common observation or belief. Don’t just blindly accept what everyone else seems to say or believe. Go to first principles. Instead of engaging with an issue from a headline, a tweet, or a take, go to the beginning. Break things down and build them back up. Put every idea to the test, the Stoics said. The good thinker approaches things with a fresh set of eyes and an open mind. 

– Think for yourself. Generally, people just do what other people are doing and want what other people want and think what other people think. This was the insight of the philosopher René Girard, who coined the theory of mimetic desire. He believed that since we don’t know what we want, we end up being drawn—subconsciously or overtly—to what others want. We don’t think for ourselves, we follow tradition or the crowd.

– Don’t be contrarian for contrarian’s sake. Peter Thiel, widely considered a “contrarian,” (and a big fan of Girard) once told me that being a contrarian is actually a bad way to go. You can’t just take what everyone else thinks and put a minus sign in front of it. That’s not thinking for yourself. So in fact, if you find yourself constantly in opposition to everyone and everything (or most consensuses) that’s probably a sign you’re not doing much thinking. You’re just being reactionary. 

– Ask good questions. When Isidor Rabi came home from school each day, his mother didn’t ask about grades or tests. “Izzy,” she would say, “did you ask a good question today?” This doesn’t seem like much, and yet it is everything. After all, questions drive discovery. The habit of asking questions turned Rabi into one of the greatest physicists of his time—a Nobel Prize winner whose work led to the invention of the MRI. Questions are the key not just to knowledge but to success, discovery, and mastery. They’re how we learn and how we get better. And they don’t have to be brilliant, probing, or incisive. They can be simple: “What do you mean?” They can be inquisitive: “How does that work?” They can aim for clarity: “Sorry, I didn’t understand, can you explain it another way?” The point is to stay curious. To never stop asking questions.

– Watch your information diet. When I’m not feeling great physically — tired, irritable, sluggish — usually it’s because I’m eating poorly. In the same way, when I feel mentally scattered and distracted — I know it’s time to focus on cleaning up my information diet. In programming, there’s a saying: “garbage in, garbage out.” Aim to let in the opposite of garbage. Because that leads to the opposite of garbage coming out.

– Go deep. I thought I knew a lot about Lincoln. I’d read biographies, watched documentaries, interviewed scholars, visited the sites. I’d even written about him in my books. So when I sat down to write about him in Part III of Wisdom Takes Work, I thought I was set. I wasn’t even close. So I went deeper. I read Hay and Nicolay. Doris Kearns Goodwin’s 944-page Team of Rivals. Michael Gerhardt’s 496-page book on Lincoln’s mentors. David S. Reynolds’s 1088-page Abe. David Herbert Donald’s 720-page Lincoln. Garry Wills’s Pulitzer Prize-winning book on the Gettysburg Address. I spoke with the documentarian Ken Burns about him, and Doris too. I read Lincoln’s letters and speeches. I went, multiple times while writing the book, to the Lincoln Memorial. In the end, I spent hundreds of hours reading thousands and thousands of pages on the man. Basically, I “dug deeply,” as Lincoln’s law partner once said of Lincoln’s own approach to learning, in order to get to the “nub” of a subject. This is a skill you need. Whether you’re an author, politician, lawyer, entrepreneur, scientist, educator, parent—you have to be able to pursue an idea, a question, a thread of curiosity until you’ve gotten to the nub and wrapped your head completely around it.

– Don’t just read, re-read. A lot of people read, not enough people re-read. Don’t just read books, re-read books. There’s a great line the Stoics loved — that we never step in the same river twice. The books don’t change, but you do.

– Seek out people who disagree with you. In 1961, the Navy sent Commander James Stockdale to Stanford to study Marxist theory. Not criticisms of Marxism—primary sources. Marx. Lenin. The works. His parents had taught him: you can’t compete against something you don’t understand. A few years later, Stockdale was shot down over North Vietnam and spent seven years being tortured in the Hanoi Hilton. His knowledge of Marxism proved essential—he understood the ideology better than his interrogators did. Seneca said we should read dangerous ideas “like a spy in the enemy’s camp.”

– Ego is the enemy. Epictetus reminds us that “it’s impossible to learn that which you think you already know.” The physicist John Wheeler said that “as our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance.” Conceitedness is the primary impediment to wisdom. That’s something I often find with AI, its quickness and confidence in its answers…which are laughably wrong. If you want to stay humble, focus on all that you still don’t know. After all, isn’t that the Socratic method? 

– Beware the Gell-Mann amnesia effect. Named after the Nobel Prize-winning physicist Murray Gell-Mann, the Gell-Mann amnesia effect is the term for a familiar experience: You read an article about something you know well, and you recognize that it’s full of errors, it’s missing context, it’s grossly oversimplifying things. You can’t believe something so bad got published. Then you turn to an article on something you know little about—foreign policy, international affairs, the economy, pop culture—and believe every word. It’s not just that the media exaggerates and sensationalizes. It’s actually worse: Most of the time they don’t even know what they’re talking about. The same goes for AI, which is trained on many of those error-filled sources. I’ve had ChatGPT confidently butcher things I know well. Why would I unquestioningly trust it on things I don’t? The problem is we don’t know what we don’t know. Which means we don’t know when we’re being fooled.

– Be flexible. A colleague of Churchill once observed that Churchill “venerated tradition but ridiculed convention.” The past was important, but it was not a prison. The old ways—what the Romans called the mos maiorum—were important but not to be mistaken as perfect. Plenty of people have been buried in coffins of their own making. Before their time too. Because they couldn’t understand that “the way they’d always done things” wasn’t working anymore. Or that “the way they were raised” wasn’t acceptable anymore. We must cultivate the capacity for change, for flexibility and adaptability. Continuously, constantly.

– Empty the cup. There is an old Zen story about a master who receives a student for tea. As the visitor extends their cup, the master pours…and pours, and pours. The cup begins to overflow. Finally, the student says something: “Stop! The cup is full. It can hold no more.” “Yes,” the master replies. “And your mind is like this cup, full of opinions and speculations. How am I to show you Zen unless you empty your cup?” This is a message about the perils of ego, obviously. It’s a message about keeping an open mind. Because the cup also does not have to be full to cause problems. “If this vessel is not clean,” the Roman poet Horace said in the first century BC, “then whatever you pour in goes sour.”

– Seek understanding, not trivia. Whenever you’re consuming anything, don’t just try to find random pieces of information. What’s the point of that? The point is to understand, to build a foundation of real, true wisdom — that you can turn to and apply in your actual life. On the literary snobs who speculate for hours about whether The Iliad or The Odyssey was written first, or who the real author was (a debate that rages on today), Seneca said, “Far too many good brains have been afflicted by the pointless enthusiasm for useless knowledge.”

– Write to think right. Peter Burke, one of Montaigne’s biographers, believed that Montaigne’s essays were precisely that, a man’s “attempt to catch himself in the act of thinking.” Montaigne said that he wrote as though he was speaking to another person. But that doesn’t mean his essays were casual or off the cuff. Montaigne had to sit and really think—the act of his thoughts flowing from his brain, down his arm, through his pen, and onto the page was a process by which much reflection was transcribed, and, since he continued to edit his writing until the day he died, refined. Only a fool goes with their first thought. A wise person takes time to contemplate.

– Create a second brain—a collection of ideas, quotes, observations, and information gathered over time. As Seneca wrote: “We should hunt out the helpful pieces of teaching and the spirited and noble-minded sayings which are capable of immediate practical application—not far far-fetched or archaic expressions or extravagant metaphors and figures of speech—and learn them so well that words become works.” (Here’s a video on my method).

– Cultivate empathy. Empathy is as much a practical skill as it is a moral one. If you don’t have the ability to think about what other people think about this or that situation, to imagine how something looks from someone else’s perspective, then you have a very limited view of reality.

– Look at the fish. When Samuel Scudder interviewed for a job with the great Harvard biologist Louis Agassiz in 1864, Agassiz placed a dead fish on a tray in front of him. “Look at the fish,” said, and then he left the room. Scudder picked it up, turned it over, counted the scales, and drew it. When Agassiz returned, he was unimpressed. “You have not looked very carefully,” he said. “You haven’t even seen one of the most conspicuous features of the animal, which is as plainly before your eyes as the fish itself; look again, look again!” This went on for three days. “Look, look, look,” Agassiz would say. What did Scudder ultimately discover about the fish? Nothing. It wasn’t about the fish. It was about focus—looking long enough and hard enough to truly see what’s in front of you. This is the skill that good, clear, deep thinking depends on.

– Find your scene. “Tell me who you consort with,” Goethe said, “and I will tell you who you are.” You need to find a scene that challenges you, inspires you, exposes you to new ideas, holds you accountable, and pushes you beyond your limits. Put yourself in rooms where you’re the least knowledgeable person. Observe. Ask questions. That uncomfortable feeling when your assumptions are challenged? Seek it out. Let it humble you.

– Assemble a board of directors. It’s important to have a mentor. It’s important to have a scene. But at the highest levels, we must develop a board of directors—people who advise and consult, who check and even correct you. This isn’t a formality but an essential practice to always be learning and improving. Whose collective experiences are you drawing on? Who in your life can tell you that you’re wrong? That you’re being an idiot? We need other voices around us. We need help. We need to be able to yield. Only a fool declines this priceless resource.

– Beware your inner child. Where do your own emotional patterns get in the way of clear thinking? When you’re hurt or betrayed or unexpectedly challenged, pay attention to how you react. Notice the “age” of that reaction. Is it mature, measured, proportional? Or does it feel more like a wounded eight-year-old lashing out? That’s your inner child—the pain you still carry from early experiences, hijacking your adult mind. Good thinking requires the ability to recognize when your inner child has taken the wheel. This is another benefit of having a board of directors—they can serve as parents to our inner child.

– Keep your identity small. This is a rule from the great Paul Graham. His point was that the more you identify with things—being a member of a certain political party, being seen as smart, being seen as someone who drives a fancy car or someone who belongs to this club or that ideology—the harder it is for you to change your mind or entertain new points of view. Stay a free agent!

– Do the work. In Wisdom Takes Work, I quote Seneca, “No man was ever wise by chance.” We must get it ourselves. We cannot delegate it to someone or something else. There is no technology that can do it for you. There is no app. There is no prompt, no shortcut or summary or step-by-step formula. There is no LLM that can spit it out in thirty seconds.

February 11, 2026by Ryan Holiday
Blog

This Is Why You Have To Care (I Can’t Believe I’m Having To Write This Again)

It’s a complicated issue. 

Maybe it doesn’t affect you directly. 

Maybe you’ve got a lot going on in your own life or your own community. 

Maybe you’d rather not think about it. 

Maybe you’d rather not hear from me about it. 

I get it. 

These are difficult, divisive times. 

There are plenty of reasons to turn off your brain or your heart. 

About six years ago, I wrote a piece about our obligation to care about what happens to other people. I wrote it in part because I was frustrated by the news that the sheriff in the rural county I live in was engaging in targeted traffic stops at night so they could detain and deport Latino immigrants (I was myself pulled over driving back from the airport one night but of course immediately let go as soon as the officer approached my car). I wrote it in part because of the videos I’d seen of the killings of George Floyd and Ahmaud Arbery.

I thought about it again the last few weeks as I watched the same horrifying videos that you may have watched.

One of the things I said in that piece was that I didn’t like the idea of “privilege” being the focus of the conversation in the discussions about the police or race. The fact that my publisher sends me early copies of books before they are released, I said, that’s a privilege. Something I didn’t earn, something that can disappear, something that I enjoy but am not entitled to.

But not being harassed on the street by the police or by vigilantes? Not being strangled to death on suspicion of some minor crime? Not being tear gassed or thrown to the ground for protesting government policies?

That’s not a privilege.

That’s a constitutional right. Actually, it’s more than a constitutional right. According to the Founding Fathers and many philosophers before and since, the rights to life and liberty and property are beyond constitutional: They are inalienable.

The right to not be murdered, to not be harassed by people with guns, to not be targeted, exploited or incarcerated unfairly, to speak your mind, to pursue your religion, for your home to be a safe haven, these are not things that governments give to their people. These are things that God—or generations of evolution and progress—endowed us with at birth, and that we in turn give governments the power to protect. 

All of us.

Black. White. Rich. Poor. Young. Old. Republican. Democrat. Socialist. Even annoying, obnoxious idiots. If these basic rights are threatened for one person, for one community, it’s threatened for all people.

Oh but these people came here illegally… But previous administrations deported a lot of people. But some of these people are criminals…Due process. Due process. Due process. That’s the answer to every one of those objections. It doesn’t matter if you’re a serial killer, everyone is entitled to their day in court.

Look, the punishment for filming I.C.E is not summary execution. The punishment for fleeing in your vehicle is not extrajudicial murder, even if a federal agent thinks you’re “a fucking bitch.” (Being shot in the face three times is not the punishment for hitting a federal officer with your car either, it’s worth saying!) The punishment for coming to the United States illegally—the punishment for overstaying your visa or indeed any kind of violation of immigration laws—is and never will be a trip to an El Salvadorian torture prison.

Immigration is a complicated issue. Crime is complicated. My dad was a cop for twenty years, I understand it’s a hard job. But this is not complicated.

Heavily armed masked agents should not be storming American streets demanding to see people’s papers. They should not be harassing citizens, making arrests and sorting things out later. They should not be harassing people because they don’t look or sound like citizens. They should not be entering schools or hospitals or courthouses or churches to try to take people away.

OK? 

It should not be controversial to say that. 

In fact, it is our job as human beings (and Stoics) to say it. 

Callous indifference to suffering by the authorities towards minorities or the poor or the voiceless is not just a lamentable fact of modern life, it’s an active crime. One we are complicit in, if we ignore it or rationalize it or tolerate it. 

Marcus Aurelius wrote two thousand years ago that “you can also commit an injustice by doing nothing.” The Stoics believed that harm to one was to harm all. Martin Luther King explained this idea of sympatheia beautifully. “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere,” he said. “We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly.”

I understand that this might not be what you want to hear from me. I write about self-improvement. I write about philosophy. I write about history. That’s true.

But what do you think the point of the study of those three things is? It’s not so you can make a little more money. It’s not so you can live in your own bubble or have interesting dinner conversations. It’s so you can be better. So you can do the right thing when it counts.

You have to realize that if the state can find ways to deprive someone of their rights, then they can find ways to deprive you of yours. If they can get away with brutalizing one group, eventually they’ll brutalize you. In fact, this is an inexorable law of power, whether it’s held by segregationists or Stalin, bureaucrats following orders or malevolent dictators. When you give power an inch, it takes another. When you allow evil to happen because you are not its victim, it will inevitably find its way to you—or if not you, to someone you love, or to your great-great-grandchildren.

That’s what Martin Niemöller’s famous poem “First they came…” is about. You know it:

First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a socialist.
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

Niemöller’s words were not theoretical. He tolerated, even complied with, policies he didn’t agree with. He rationalized them, assuming his Christian church would be protected. For a while, it was. But in the end, Niemöller found himself in Dachau, where he nearly died. Someone later asked how he could have been so self-absorbed, so silent when it mattered. “I am paying for that mistake now,” he said, “and not me alone, but thousands of other persons like me.”

It is essential that you see it this way. Because when you do, you realize that this affects you, it affects everyone. 

Directly. 

Urgently.

There is no such thing as an issue that doesn’t affect you. We are all bees of the same hive, Marcus writes in Meditations. There is no injustice far enough away, no victim different enough, no rationalization clever enough to make you exempt from the single hive we all share.

It may be complicated.

But your obligation isn’t.

You have to care.

January 28, 2026by Ryan Holiday
Blog

I’ve Done This Every Day for Nine Years. It Changed My Life.

It’s weird how much you don’t remember, even of your own life. 

Even things that happened not that long ago can come back to you as total surprises. 

I opened an old worn copy of my One Line a Day journal this morning and was flipping through dates. 

On June 14th, 2017, I had lunch in Oklahoma City with a guy named Mark Daigneault, an up and coming coach in the G-League of the NBA…and now he’s the head coach and defending NBA champion of the Oklahoma City Thunder. On Dec 7th, 2017, we woke up to four inches of snow on our ranch. On October 19th, 2019 I had to kill a rattlesnake near the garage. A couple months later, I was walking my boys down our road when two loose pit bulls attacked us. I frantically searched around for anything to fight them off with before miraculously, mysteriously they ran back in the direction they had come from. 

July 2nd, 2018 was the day I wrote the first words of Stillness is the Key. July 2nd, 2017 is the day my oldest son crawled for the first time. In the fall of 2019, I kept popping in to “look at that building” which would become The Painted Porch over a year later. 

On a very disappointing day in February 2023, I discovered that an employee I had just promoted was actually stealing from us—and the next day, had a very emotionally difficult confrontation with them about it.

March 30th, 2025: I took my son to see Hamilton, and then we got sushi after. March 17th, 2022: We drove six hours to Balmorhea to swim in one of the most amazing spring-fed pools in the world. March 12th, 2020: My wife and I called and woke up her parents who were in Europe and told them we really, really thought they needed to come home because this pandemic thing was real. The next day, my son was home and the lockdowns began. 

In late April 2019, I had a call with an accountant we were using and I lost my temper and yelled and fired him in a way I regretted even in the moment. On Christmas evening in both 2024 and 2025, we went to the same Waffle House in Florida near the airport.

To catch a tight morning flight out of JFK in June of 2024, I got to fly in a helicopter to the airport…and then the next day I woke up with COVID. Over a four-day stretch in September 2023, my kids and I got our ATV stuck in the mud on our ranch, then I flew to LA to interview Arnold Schwarzenegger… before driving to Ojai for a talk the next morning…before flying so I could be home with the kids for twenty hours before flying back to LA to do a talk with Robert Greene to a sold out crowd at the historic Wilshire Ebell Theatre. 

I remember some of these things better than others. I know what happened because I wrote it all down. 

I’m sure there’s “better” stuff tucked away in the some 3,300 days I’ve filled out so far, and if I was writing a memoir or something, maybe I would take the time to find those keystone days. That’s not really the point. What strikes me most about what I see when I flip through it is the ordinary wonderful days, the little moments and memories, the rhythms of life on a ranch, as a writer, as a parent. 

I see the person I was. I see the person I am becoming. I see the person I want to be again. I see mistakes I don’t want to make anymore. 

I don’t remember exactly how, when, or where I first heard about the One Line a Day journal, but it’s changed my life. Although I’ve been journaling off and on for longer, I’ve been using one of these One Line a Day Journals for nine years now, going on ten. It’s something I’ve done every single day. Sometimes in the morning, but usually at night before bed. I take a few minutes and I write down something that feels like it defines the day I just had—something I wanted to remember about the day.

I’ve taken it pretty much everywhere in the U.S., and all over the world (Europe, Australia, South America at least). The pages are structured so you write just one line for each day, and the years stack on top of each other. January 14th, 2017 sits above January 14th, 2018, which sits above 2019, 2020, 2021, and so on. So you can see what you wrote on the same date one, two, five years ago. 

In these pages, I can see multiple drives across the country. I can see the patterns of catching colds and overworking. I can see the rhythms of the retail and the speaking businesses. I can see the ups and downs of nearly half my marriage. I can see the entirety of COVID. I can see political trends. I can chart books I conceived, wrote, published and promoted. I can see my kids growing up.

Some of it I vaguely remember. Most of it I had completely forgotten (On August 28th 2019, I apparently had dinner at a table with Condoleezza Rice and Paul Ryan. What?! What did we talk about? I don’t remember.) And without these pages, it would all be gone. 

From these jottings, I can piece things back together. I can travel back in time. I can marvel at the absurdities. I can be grateful. I can try to remember how easy it is to get lost in the day-to-dayness of your own existence while you’re in it. 

One line. One sentence. What did I think about today? Where did I go? What happened? How am I doing?

That’s it.

It sounds like nothing. And in a way, it is nothing—but those words accumulate. And after years of entries, you have something priceless: a record of who you’ve been, what you’ve done, how you’ve gotten to where you are.

When Joan Didion was five years old, her mother gave her a small notebook, to keep her busy, and it did—for the rest of her life. Of course, she used those notebooks as a writer and screenwriter, but Didion was reluctant to reduce her notebooks to just a professional tool. In a famous essay called “On Keeping a Notebook,” she flips through scraps of dialogue she had put down at a train station in Delaware, or recollections of childhood experiences, or facts about pollution in New York City. She wonders why she had bothered to write it all down. Who was this person who had felt the need to record so many seemingly banal things?

Then she realized, that was the point. “I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be,” she writes. “We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never forget.” Capturing little thoughts and moments—however seemingly mundane or insignificant—in the pages of her notebook was, she wrote, a way of keeping in touch with herself, a way of remembering “what it was to be me.”

A journal is a means of taking a picture, both of what you see in a moment…and the person seeing it.

Perhaps there is no area of life where such a practice is more helpful and important than parenting. Because you’re so busy and so much is happening and you can so easily forget to remember who you and they were day to day. (That’s what I built The Daily Dad Journal around. One question every day for five years.)

When I flip back through my journals, the person who wrote those entries a year ago, five years ago, nine years ago feels like a stranger in some ways. His concerns were different. His kids were smaller. His life was calmer. It was also crazier. But he’s also recognizably me. I can see the threads that connect us, the patterns that persist, the things that mattered then and still matter now. All the selves I have been on the way to becoming who I am today.

The biggest regret that comes through? Besides wishing that I slowed down a little and was present more…is that I wish I had started the journal earlier and could go back even further. 

It’s a gift to be able to check in with all those past versions of me. To stay on nodding terms with them. To remember what it was to be them.

A gift that costs almost nothing.

Just one line a day.

January 15, 2026by Ryan Holiday
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“If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” - Murakami

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